Fallen From Grasp
by Azarya
Summary: Sakura and Syaoran are 18 and some thing is wrong. Syaoran seems to be drifting away from Sakura..away from everyone. **Warning..Sad/Dark but with a happy ending** New Lost Chapter.
1. Default Chapter

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Fallen From Grasp

"I'm so happy Syaoran!" Sakura laughed. She wrapped her arms around his waist and nuzzled her head into the back of his light green, cotton button-up shirt. He clasped his hands over hers and squeezed them protectively. He shut his eyes and sighed deeply.

"I'm glad you are" He said. The gurgling sounds of a stream filled his ears and he opened his eyes. A bright light surrounded him and Sakura and they found themselves in a beautiful valley. Bright pink flowers and vibrant green grass covered the ground in a pretty blanket. A river babbled gently with clear, blue water and birds sang sweet melodies.

"This place is beautiful." Sakura breathed. She released her hold from around Syaoran's waist and grasped tightly to one of his hands.

"I'm pleased that you agree." He said, closing his eyes again.

Sakura closed her eyes as well and began to hum a song (Hi To Tsu Dake if you're wondering ^^). She turned around to wrap her arms around Syaoran's waist again but found she was holding nothing. The beautiful valley became shrouded with darkness. The beautiful flowers and babbling river disappeared.

"Syaoran!" She screamed, watching in horror as the darkness crept around her feet and wrapped around her body, engulfing her in to a void as empty and as dark as a black hole.

"Syaoran!" Came her last plea as she was drown into the dark silence.

"Ahhhhhhh!" Sakura screamed. She shot out of her deep sleep. She panted hard, a cold sweat beading on her forehead. Her sheets felt clammy and she shuddered as a breeze blew through an open window.

'Why is the window open?' she wondered. Pushing aside her sheets, she clambered to the window. The cool, crisp night air was refreshing after her nightmare. When the wind picked up, she closed the window. "Augh," she mumbled "I still don't feel to great." She wandered down the hallway to the second-floor bathroom and turned on the tap. She splashed the cool water over her face.

"That felt much better." She said, patting her face dry with a towel. She tried to push the dream to the back of her mind but found that she couldn't help but wonder what the nightmare meant.

"Syaoran.." She spoke to her reflection in the mirror.

Sakura stumbled groggily back to her room where she picked up the phone. She clumsily tried to dial Syaoran's number but found that it took her three times to get the number correct.

"Hello" said the warm masculine voice at the other end of the call. The sound of his voice sent tingles down her spine.

"Syaoran," she said softly. Her hands trembled slightly and she nearly lost her grip on the phone. "Are you alright?" She asked, sitting down on the edge of her bed.

"I'm fine," he said softly, "Just sleepy. May I ask you why you're calling me at 3 am in the morning?"

"I had a nightmare and I wanted to talk to someone." She replied.

"It makes me feel special when you think of me first." He said. She couldn't help but smile.

"You are very special to me." She said.

"Thanks"

"No, thank you." She said "I think I can actually go to sleep now. I feel much better now. Thanks for talking."

"Your welcome, Sakura." He said "Talk to you later."

"Bye"

"Ja ne"

Sakura pressed the 'end' button on the phone and set it on her desk. 'He's so sweet' she thought. She stumbled over to the windowsill and leaned against the sill. She glanced towards the moon, and became lost in thought. "I love you Syaoran Li" She mouthed before climbing back into her bed and drifting off to sleep.

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"Why did she call me so late?" Syaoran wondered. He picked up his pink Sakura-bear and fiddled with one of tiny white wings.

"I love her, but then why am I so afraid?" He sighed, frustrated by his own confusion and tossed himself down on his bed.

"Why?" He wondered out loud.

"Why?!" He dropped the bear and held his head as if something was paining him. Soon he drifted of into a restless, fitful sleep.

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"Oi!" Sakura called, waving at Syaoran. "Wait for me!" She raced to catch up to him on her roller blades. He smiled warmly towards her and she grasped his hand.

"Feeling any better?" He asked as they walked, a hint of concern in his voice. The warm summer breeze blew gently, playing with Sakura's long, light brown locks and Syaoran's unruly deep brown hair.

"Yes I am, thank you." She replied, beaming.

"Whoa!" Syaoran kidded "any brighter and I'll have to invest in a pair of sunglasses!"

Sakura elbowed him in the ribs. "Quit kidding around." She said playfully.

"Alright! Alright! I give up!" He said, raising his hands. "You win!" A brief wave of pain washed through his head.

"Great!" She said triumphantly.

Syaoran frowned and looked off into the distance, deep in thought. A tear came to his eye and he quickly pushed it away before she could notice. 'What's wrong with me?' he thought. 'I need to get over this. I can't be like this around her.'

"Syaoran, what's the matter?" Sakura touched his shoulder gently. He jumped at her touch.

"N-nothing." He said, walking away quickly. He clutched his Sakura-bear that was hidden in his bag. He hung his head down, looking at his feet.

"Hang on!" Sakura called. She wanted to go after Syaoran but her feet wouldn't move. "Why is he acting like this?" She wondered, deeply concerned.

"I wish I knew, Sakura-chan." Syaoran murmured "I wish I knew."

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"What is this?!" Syaoran asked himself, enraged. He angrily slammed a textbook against the wall and grasped hold of his hair, curled up in to a ball and rocked back and forth on his bed. He screamed silently inside and hurled another book at the wall.

"Syaoran-sama, is there a problem?" Wei opened the door a crack and looked inside.

"There is nothing wrong." Syaoran said slowly. He looked at Wei, his face non-emotional yet was tear-stained and there was an emptiness in his eyes. Wei could sense hostility.

"If you're sure" he said and shut the door.

As soon as Wei's footsteps were no longer heard on the stairs, Syaoran snapped. He picked up a lamp and hurled it to the floor. He continued to smash various items on the floor and walls. His own scream filled his own ears. He stopped, surprised by his own screaming. He crawled shakily to a corner and wrapped himself in a blanket. He began to rock back and forth continuingly, muttering hysterically "not me. Why me?"

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"So he hasn't talked to you in two days?" Tomoyo asked, her voice was more concerned than cheerful. Sakura could hear her emotions clearly over the phone. Sakura trembled, full of confused feelings.

"I'm so worried Tomoyo. He's been becoming distant in the last week. Is it my fault?" Tears came to Sakura's eyes as she sat in her room and she hugged her Syao-bear close in comfort. The dimly lit room made her feel worse.

"But he's always been sort of anti social hasn't he?"

"Yes but now he's even more distant!" Sakura exclaimed, trying to control her tears as they spilled down her cheeks.

"It's alright Sakura-chan; you'll be fine. Don't be so worried, he'll get over this. He's probably just under stress. It's not your fault, don't blame yourself for something that you didn't cause. Try to talk to him. Maybe he just needs a hand to pull him out of this. You could be his light in the darkness."

"Maybe" Sakura said. Tomoyo was the best friend anyone could have. She was always there for her friends when they needed her, gave them advice to cheer them up and comforted them. Sakura found it an advantage to have Tomoyo as a friend. She sometimes warned Tomoyo that she was too kind for her own good but Tomoyo had just smiled and said that she loved to make people happy.

"Don't doubt yourself, Sakura. You'll reach him."

"I hope you're right." Sakura smiled through her tears.

"That's more like it." Tomoyo said. "Call him later and talk to him."

"I will" She said. "Ja ne Tomoyo-chan! Thanks for your help!"

"Ja mata ne, Sakura-chan and you're welcome." The line gave a tone as Tomoyo hung up and the dial tone hummed. Sakura pressed the 'end' button and set the phone on the headboard of her bed and quickly fell asleep.

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The beautiful valley re-appeared and Sakura found herself near the babbling river once again. The dream was the same except...where was Syaoran?

Sakura whipped her head around, frantically trying to find him. She quickly spotted him and raced off to catch him.

"Syaoran! Wait up!" She cried running up to him. She reached for his hand but he vanished.

"No!" She screamed. The darkness came quickly and a voice spoke.

"Fallen." Was the only word spoken. The darkness surrounded her once more and engulfed her..

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["BRING."] The phone rang and fell with a soft thud on to Sakura's lap. She groggily sat upright and picked up the phone.

"Moshi moshi?" She asked, still half asleep.

"Sakura-chan..." Came Syaoran's voice. She could hear his voice tremble.

"Syaoran...What's wrong? Please tell me." She pleaded. She held the phone close to her ear and felt tears come to her eyes once more. "Please..."

"But I can't." He said softly "I can't tell you.. I can't tell anyone.."

"Don't hang up!" Sakura said. "Meet me at the park, later."

"At midnight." Syaoran answered and hung up. The dial tone filled Sakura's ears. She looked up at the clock she kept up on the headboard. 11:48 pm. She had twelve minutes to get to the park.

Unaware and not caring about the state of her clothes or hair, she raced to the park on her roller blades. "Please let him be alright" she gasped as she approached the Penguin slide.

"Kinomoto-chan," Came Syaoran's voice. She turned to face him.

"Why are you calling me by my last name, Syaoran. You haven't done that for six years."

He looked away from her, trying not to make eye contact. "I'm afraid, Sakura. I can't love you anymore."

Sakura took a step towards him, tears coming to her eyes. "But Syaoran, I can help you."

He kissed her softly on the cheek. "No, you can't." He said, frustrated. "No one can!" He took of running.

Sakura was speechless. She raced off after him only to find that he had disappeared.

"I loved you, Syaoran Li but something happened. Why did you become distant? I guess that this is what my dream meant. And now you've fallen from my grasp. Forever." She collapsed to her knees and began to sing softly.

"Nobody wants to be lonely Nobody wants to cry My body's longing to hold you So bad it hurts inside Time is precious and its slipping away And I've been waiting for you all my life Nobody wants to be lonely so why... Why? Why don't you let me love you?"

As he ran, Syaoran began to remember the words to a song he had heard a long time ago. He unknowingly began to mumble the words as tears came to his eyes.

"When I woke up the rain was pouring down  
There were people standing all around  
Something warm flowing through my eyes  
But somehow I found, my baby that night  
I lifted her head, she looked at me and said  
"Hold me darlin' just a little while."  
I held her close and kissed her our last kiss  
I found the love that I knew I had missed  
But now she's gone even though I hold her tight  
I lost my love, my life  
That night."

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~~ Azarya ~~

This was suppose to be a sad/dark fic. In fact, I think this is one of the few fics that are sad. I hopefully won't get any flames saying that it was stupid how I separated Sakura and Syaoran. Disclaimer: the characters belong to their respected owners, not to me so please do not sue me. I'm not making any money off of this. It was a fic written for the fans by the fans. Thank you.


	2. Lost chapter: My Heart and Soul

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Lost Chapter: My Heart and Soul

Sakura slowly walked through penguin park, her books pressed against her chest, eyes on the ground. A single tear slid down her cheek and fell to the ground. She pushed away the unwanted tears and sighed. It had been almost one year since she had seen Syaoran. Now 19, she wished desperately that she knew what was wrong. She hadn't received a letter nor a call explaining why he was gone. She didn't know whether to be angry or upset. She had, of course, sent many letters to his residence in Hong Kong, asking what was wrong but she had never gotten a reply.

Clouds washed over the moon creating erie shadows. Sakura continued walking, head down, wallowing in sadness until she came across an opening from overgrown trees and the cobblestone path. She slowly lifted her head to see the old, rusting penguin slide. She hadn't been there since that fateful night about one year ago. She slide to the cool, damp ground, her back against the slide. She drew her knees closer to her and let her tears flow freely down her cheeks and spill on her arms. "I miss him so much..." 

"Really?"

"Really..." Sakura turned around in fright and saw him. Sitting on top of the slide was tall, dark figure. "Syao... Syao.. Syaoran?!" She exclaimed softly in confusion. She stood and roughly wiped the tears that slid from her eyes with her arm. She slowly began to back away, wanting to run from her problems.

"Please don't run." He pleaded. He leapt off the slide and ran up to her. Softly, he placed a hand on her shoulder and she stopped backing away. They stood in silence for a few moments, neither knowing what to say.

"Please explain what happened.." Said Sakura finally. She began to walk away. He followed her and began his explanation.

"I guess it started a little more than a year ago. I guess I just started to....well.. fall apart. I didn't know why then but I do know the reason now. When I went back to Hong Kong, I was diagnosed with schizophrenia. I only had a small mild case but I still had paranoia and social anxiety. I still am a little paranoid..."

"So you're a schizo?" Asked Sakura, beginning to understand.

He smiled then continued "I guess you could say that. Over the last year I've been going to counselling and now they think I'm cured... although Meiling-san didn't help much." A grim expression had been plastered on his face while he explained this. They had stopped near the park entrance. Slowly, they turned to face each other.

"I didn't realise.. I could have been more supportive.. I could have helped more..." said Sakura. Tears and anger welled inside her. She was disgusted with her own ignorance.

He placed his hands on her shoulders and smiled. "Don't worry. I would have been hard to notice anyway." He smiled warmly and she weakly smiled back.

"I'm glad I know. But why didn't you answer any of my letters?"

"That was Meiling. She figured that I shouldn't write or answer anything. I was cut off from the world for about 10 months. I feel really bad about that." He hugged her close.

"Thank you" she said, letting him hug her. "But will you be with me forever? Even if it doesn't work out....will you still be my friend?" She asked, drawing away from him to look him in the face.

"Hai, I will be. I promise. You'll always be in my heart and soul." they stood bathed in moonlight under the arch near the entrance in the park, arms wrapped around each other, hugging each other close, promising to always be there for each other. Syaoran's words echoed gently in in Sakura's head as a promise she knew he would never break. Heart and soul......

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Azarya 2001

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There. A happy ending. Hope this clears everything up. I know it was a little short but hopefully it makes things better. I wrote this after I had first finished Fallen From Grasp and I finally got around to finishing it. Hope you enjoyed it!


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